Are You Raising One of the Next Generation of Hoodlums by Prince O. & Dr. Joyce Willard Teal

When those of us who have worked with children in the public schools of this country think in terms of the state of Black America regarding the education system, we cannot help but focus our attentions on what it is that our boys and girls are being exposed to in their home life. We cannot help but as ourselves whether or not our boys and girls are getting the idea in their homes that teachers are to be listened to, obeyed and respected, or if the messages they receive are just the converse.

Chapter 10 (see below) in the recently released, Are You Raising One of the Next Generation of Hoodlums, was written from Dr. Joyce Teal´s perspective as a classroom teacher for more than thirty years.

Does Your Child Expect that You Will Show up at His School for Conferences?

When I was a classroom teacher, there were numerous times when a student said to me, "She/he ain´t coming!" This was in response to my invitation and/or request for the parent to come to the school for a conference. At many of the schools where I taught, parents were invited to come to the school one evening at the end of selected grading periods to collect their children´s report cards and to have a conference with each of their children´s teachers, or selected ones, who had requested a conference.

While it is clear that sometimes circumstances will prevent any of us from doing something that we ought to do, no child should be made to feel that his or her parent definitely "Ain´t coming!" Establishing with your child that you have no intention or desire to attend his school conferences says to him in a non-verbal manner that he is not your priority. Children are smart, and they are also intuitive. They know when they are your priority. Your child sees other children´s parents attend school conferences. He knows the children whose parents are frequent visitors to the school. He knows the children whose parents take off from their jobs to chaperone occasional field trips. He knows the children whose parents rarely show up at the school. He knows the children whose parents come to the school only when their children have been suspended and they must do so in order to get their children back in school. So be aware that your child is intelligent and has the ability to recognize that if time can be made for the parent to get to the school when the child has been suspended, time could be made for the parent to attend conferences!

Subtle messages are given to children, even when parents have no intention of sending them. Refusing to or failing to attend conferences at your child´s school does not send a positive message to your child. And please be aware of this: the fact that you have no intention of sending a message does not mean that you have not sent one. Nor does it mean that your child hasn´t received one!

There are parents who have never been to a conference at his or her child´s school, and for the most part, this in inexcusable. Maybe you can´t make all of them, but if you want to do so, if it is important to you to do so, you can and will make some of them.

Please know that it´s more important than you might think. So take the time to attend conferences at you child´s school. You won´t regret it. You will be enlightened, and you very well could learn something about your child that could alert you at an early phase of its development so that you will not allow a potential problem to reach maturity.

In terms of the state of Black America regarding the education system, the outcry is more often than not about the children´s inappropriate behavior. But as a long-time educator and advocate for children, there is no doubt in my mind that the children´s behavior is reactionary. And one might be tempted to ask, "To what are the children reacting?" They are reacting to a lot of things, among them being the chaos in their homes, their parents´ attitudes regarding the education system, their parents´ attitudes regarding education; their parents´ attitudes regarding the teachers – to name just a few.

We need parents to be positive when it comes to the state of Black America regarding the education system. We need parents to make it clear to their children that they have the expectation that the children are being sent to school to get an education and that they are getting a good education. We need parents to be involved in their children´s education so that if there are gaps taking place, these gaps will be noted early on and filled. We need parents to promote respect for teachers and to demand that their children respect their teachers. Let´s face it, the only way the masses are going to receive an education is through the public schools. Just about all of us in Black America who are educated received our education in the public schools. So there is no question that public education can work for each child. The question is, "What are you willing to do as a parent to assure that it works for your child?"