What is it About New York Politicians? by JAY LILLIE

www.jaylillie.com

A good friend gave me the following report over the weekend:

I was on a flight from London to New York last week when I overheard a rather loud comment down the isle from behind me. The voice sounded familiar. Not to be too obvious I waited ten micro-seconds before turning around to see what the person looked like. It was my father's sister's daughter . . . the loud mouth New Yorker in the family.

What's on your mind, I asked her a few minutes later when they turned off the seatbelt sign, and I sat down in the open seat next to her. The guy on her other side seemed relieved to have me share her attention.

We had two womanizers in the Governor's chair she said. One left in disgrace because he got caught doing the same thing he prosecuted others for, and our replacement Governor even seems proud of his adultery.

I think the second guy is a stalking horse for Obama the man on her left said, but my cousin was not distracted.

And the two Senators from New York, what did we do to deserve them?

One of them wants to be President, the neighbor said.

Cous gave him the look she used to save for our fifth grade math teacher when he put a quiz on the blackboard. Hey, anything to get her out of New York, she said.

I asked her if New York politicians were really any worse than those in other states.

Where can you find another like Schumer?

He seems quite reasonable, I said.

Is it reasonable to be an announced pro Israeli Senator who fights every attempt by his opposition in Congress to help out the Jewish State?

Maybe he works behind the scenes, I said.

So he's a hypocrite.

You've got a point there, the neighbor said, and it got him a nod from my cousin.

You don't even live in New York, I said.

So what; Hillary never lived there either. She's a real carpet bagger that one. I'm just poor. I can't afford to live where I work.

How about Giuliani? Did you like him?

He's my man, the guy on her left said.

He was a small man. Like a general without a war, he could not rise to greatness, she said.

So who do you like? I asked.

I like Obama. He was on the Harvard Law Review, you know. That means he's really smart, and he's not from New York.

Smarter than Schumer?, the neighbor asked.

Why are you two men ganging up on me?

You're smart too, I said. You can't blame us for trying to learn from you.

Oh God, she said. I forgot. You're a New York politician too aren't you.